Thursday, May 03, 2007

Throw Away the Key!
By PopCultureWhore

The LA city attorney has recommended that Paris Hilton spend 45 days in jail for her drunk driving arrest. Yes! Do it! Lock her in a tower and make her the whore in the iron mask. Make her listen to Jessica Simpson music! I know she’s not going to do a damn day in jail, but a PCW can dream.

Private Dumbass
By PopCultureWhore

Jessica Simpson needs to stop. First, she agreed to star in a remake of “Working Girl” and now she is going to star in a movie that sounds suspiciously like Goldie Hawn’s “Private Benjamin.” Simpson will play a down-on-her-luck actress who joins the marines, presumably to spread joy and hair products throughout the land. Seriously, though, she either needs to meet a producer who doesn’t produce pop treacle and record an album of substance (…) or just call it a day. No more movies – please. Dukes of Hazard gave me brain spasms for months.

Yes, Please
By PopCulture Whore

Put together ... or a little scruffy. Whatever.

That's What PCW Said
By PopCultureWhore

The sitcom gods will smile on me with new episodes of “The Office” and “30 Rock” tonight. I was away for all the Alec Baldwin madness, but he seriously can’t quit “30 Rock”. Tina Fey is great, but Jack’s one liners make the show. Perhaps it will make more people tune in, like when people actually went to see “Nine Months” after Hugh Grant got caught with that prostitute (an aside: baked beans, Hugh? Really?) Alec wasn’t really bashful and apologetic, however. He appeared on “The View” starring as the crazy lady who lives in an attic and pledged to write a book about disenfranchised divorced dads. Sounds like a real page turner, Alec! He’d probably have better luck joining born-again Stephen’s quest to rid his NY town of porn.

In “Office” news, tonight’s episode finds Phyllis the victim of a flasher. It’s probably Creed. AOL also has a trailer for John Krasinski’s (Jim) upcoming movie “License to Wed.” Sadly, it looks pretty crappy. John and Mandy Moore are an engaged couple who must pass a marriage test administered by Mandy’s priest, played by Robin Williams. Bleh. Maybe I’ll rent it on Netflix and just turn the sound off.

Congrats to “The Office”, however, for getting a Webby Award nomination for their “webisodes”. The awards are apparently the Oscars of the Internet and acceptance speeches must be five words or less. Perfect opportunity for “That’s what she said.”
Whore Cakes Returning Soon
By PopCultureWhore

I've returned from China. Madonna has returned from Malawi. Pop culture goodness on its way!