Hot Child in the City - PopCultureWhoreNYC@gmail.com

Monday, March 19, 2007

True Love Wins Again
By PopCultureWhore





















The world may never witness another Camelot, but tonight we’ve come a little closer. Shanna Moakler has reunited with drummer husband Travis Barker. “I’m madly in love with my husband,” she tells People magazine. Barker was too busy texting Paris Hilton to comment for the story. I kid. Paris is probably too busy ordering her minion publicist to do damage control on the photo that emerged this morning of the heiress in a possibly compromising position with a well-known rapper. But I digress. Travis and Shanna split last year after he accused her of being a lazy cheat. He then made out with Hilton at a club, a MySpace blog battle ensued, Shanna allegedly assaulted Hilton at another Hollywood club, lost out on “Dancing with the Stars” and likely figured that Barker was probably the best thing she had going for herself. Seriously, honey, we saw you act on “Meet the Barkers”. Stick to lingerie and bitch sessions.

(Source)


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This Must Stop
By PopCultureWhore




The opening chords of this Gap commercial with Claire Danes now elicit groans from my roommate. It was probably a cute idea when a group of Williams marketing grads came up with the idea between hits of meth and creamy Skippy peanut butter, but if you’re going to have an early 90’s TV star dance around in her underwear, make it something interesting like Shannen Doherty or Elizabeth “Nomi” Berkley. Claire doesn’t need boyfriend khakis. She needs a push-up bra and a course on how not to date guys with girlfriends who are seven months pregnant. But that’s neither here nor there.

If I’m forced to watch Gap commercials, show me this one. Those are some boyfriend pants I’d wear:


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Sisterly Love: Amelle BerraDUH
By PopCultureWhore
















I have no idea who the Sugarbabes are, but I’m sure they’re a UK pop trash confection I’d love if I were living the lifestyle of an alcoholic socialite in London. Anyway, I mention them because it appears that one of the group’s members, Amelle Berrabah, has returned to a boyfriend who was accused of raping her sister. Wow. How low does your self-esteem have to be to date your sister’s alleged rapist? And check out this picture. He looks like a low-rent Michael Buble, and Buble already falls into my “looking rough” category. I mean, Amelle also looks like Eva Longoria’s collagen-challenged third cousin, so perhaps it’s a match made in heaven, but he was accused of raping your sister, you whore! You’d be better off waiting until Jordan’s half-wit, five-year-old, blind and obese son Harvey comes of age!

(Source)

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Um, What?
By PopCultureWhore



This is apparently a video intended to teach vulnerable Japanese (?) women how to protect themselves against American attackers wielding butter knives and sporting panties on their heads. There are also some nifty hand movements (and snazzy early 90's bike short/sports bra combos) to help you learn the necessary vocab to fend off a mugging and alert the nearest police officer. Spare me my life!

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