Want to Look Like a Crackwhore?
“Sunset Tans” re-affirms why I never want to live in Los Angeles. My pasty, carb-eating ass prefers to simply watch the madness from the comfort of my box-sized Manhattan apartment. The clip above features a mother who paid $1300 so that her pint-sized daughter could get a “cocktail” of tanning procedures for her upcoming school picture. The store’s impudent manager sold the package by telling the Social Services-bound mother that it was the same package purchased by the now twice rehabbed Lindsay Lohan; a revelation that prompted much oohing and aahing from mother and daughter alike. Too bad mini-Lohan ended up looking like an oompa loompa instead of her alcoholic idol.
Tonight I watched an episode that featured the brain dead “Olly Twins” (Molly and Holly!) sexually harassing Chris Kattan. We also saw the aforementioned impudent manager Nick being shuttled to Las Vegas to check out a Sunset Tans location set to open in The Palms casino hotel. Unfortunately he was a little put off by a naked model jumping on him after he administered a spray tan; worrying what his stern-looking girlfriend might think about the situation. I was just shocked that he had a girlfriend. When they showed his apartment and roommate, I was sure we had a Will and Grace scenario going on.