Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Willie Slays Hearts, Dinner Theatre
By Telly Whore

Paradise City has succeeded in breaking the fundamental rule of reality television – no fewer than five and no more than eight cast members (and preferably more women than men). So far, my count is up to 10 people and each time I watch, someone new is added to the mix. How can we as viewers be expected to keep up with all of these characters and their little idiosyncrasies? How will I know who to hate? How will I know who deserves my sympathy? It’s almost not fair.

On the brighter side, the mystery of Willie has been solved. I was able to surmise that Willie is some kind of warrior Neanderthal who runs around in circles shirtless. Apparently, his body speaks volumes more than his personality. Lucky for Willie, his dry personality didn’t deter the scorned Greta from choosing him as her second-runner up lover when she realized that Rick was just not interested, nor would he ever be interested, in her.


Speaking of Rick, was it me or was he laughing a little too hard at Anthony’s fake hypnosis show? I mean, the show was cute and it was amusing how Anthony “hypnotized” the guy and made him believe that the girl was lifting her shirt, but Anthony is no Dane Cook. Rick was doubled over laughing as if he had not seen the show about one hundred times already. Hmmm, I may have to keep my eyes on those two.

Up to her old tricks, mean girl Molly, in true queen bee fashion, whispers to Rick during the show that April has a boyfriend. Of course, this leads to another series of unfortunate events in the April/Rick saga. Keeping with the high school theme, Rick invites a bunch of PHAT (pretty hot and tempting) girls to his impromptu soiree with the sole intent of making April bitterly jealous. Needless to say, it works and April storms away. Jenner stays behind to give Rick a piece of her mind, only to have him shut her up by reminding her of her ignorance to the situation. Has April really written Rick off? Does that mean that JJ has a chance?

Okay, enough about the popular crowd. Greta finds her self in like with Willie and I guess Willie is in like with her too but unfortunately for the star-crossed lovers, neither of them are bold enough to make the first move so instead they go back and forth and discuss absolutely nothing. Willie, just kiss the girl already! Can’t you smell the desperation?

Paradise City has managed to leave its viewers with some unanswered questions, guaranteeing that we will tune in at least one more time. Have Jack and Jenner cooled off even before they heated up? Will April find out that her BFF stabbed her in the back and if so, will Molly get bitch-slapped? Where’s JJ? Will Lacy have a hot hook up of her own or continue to play the background? When will Willie cut his hair (he looks like the caveman from the Geico commercial)?

Stay tuned…

No comments: