Screech In Danger!
Dustin Diamond, aka Screech from “Saved by the Bell,” is having a rough year. First, he almost loses his house to foreclosure and now the poor dear was mugged at a hotel in Nebraska. We’ll ignore the obvious question about why Screech was in a hotel in Omaha and just pray that young lad will not have any lasting emotional damage. According to reports, a mace-wielding woman crashed Screech’s room and made off with several PSP games, which were later recovered. At one point, Screech pinned her against the door, prompting her to cry rape. Rest assured my lady, Screech doesn’t get down for just anyone. I think this might have been a meth lab deal gone bad. He’d supplied the cold medicine and she was about to hand over the cash, but got a bit too confident and made a run for it. With his sidekick Stephanie Tanner no longer in the biz, Screech was a little less on point than he normally is, but luckily the woman was so jazzed on Robitussin and Percocet, she couldn’t quite escape.